Why I Love to Create a Safe Space in My Salon for Black Women

Every Black woman’s head of hair tells a story. On the surface, my role as a hairstylist is to transform the outside, but the most impactful part of my job is the inner transformation. The relationship Black women have with their hairstylists is a unique dynamic, unlike any other connection a woman may encounter throughout her life. A Black woman’s hair is an outward expression of her experiences—her deepest traumas, greatest achievements, struggles, and liberation. As a hairstylist, my job is to create a space that allows Black women to express themselves fully. 

Creating a Judgment-Free, Safe Space 

My overall mission at Buffy’s Hair Club is to create a judgment-free, a safe space where Black women feel seen, heard, and appreciated. Black women are not always welcomed in commercial beauty spaces because of the uniqueness of our features and the direct opposition they pose to Eurocentric beauty standards. As a result, many are on guard about their hair, have a lack of information about proper hair care, and some even feel ashamed of their texture due to past experiences with inexperienced stylists. 

As a 4C girl myself, it has always been important for me to make women with all textures feel beautiful—especially my fellow type 4 hair sisters. Growing up, I was teased about my texture and became accustomed to apologizing to stylists for the “difficulty” of my hair. Over time, I realized that my hair was not difficult—the beauty industry simply wasn’t designed for it. Systemically, the industry has been centered around European hair, leaving Black women underserved. One of my famous quotes is: “4C hair is like an expensive fabric—like cashmere or wool—and must be treated with the same care.” I take pride in making kinky hair care feel effortless. I have centered my education around the tightest curl patterns so that when a woman like me walks into my salon, she doesn’t enter with shame. She walks in feeling confident that she is in good hands and will leave feeling empowered. 

Educating and Empowering Clients 

There are many misconceptions about Black hair, and unfortunately, companies often target the Black audience for profit rather than providing quality products. One of the biggest challenges my clients face is their perspective on their hair. Many believe their hair is “too much” or too time-consuming. I counter this with routines and systems that are designed for kinky hair textures, not European ones. The most common concerns for kinky hair are length retention and chronic dryness. Once I educate my clients on nutrition, proper detangling and styling techniques, treatments, and trims, all notice improvements within six months. 

A key part of this process is treating the topic with sensitivity. Many Black women have experienced trauma with their hair and have given up hope. However, through a gentle approach and active listening, I have seen even the most discouraged clients embrace their hair with renewed confidence. 

Hair as a Reflection of Health and Life Experiences 

You can tell a lot about a woman by her hair. As a stylist specializing in natural hair for over a decade, I’ve learned that early signs of health imbalances frequently show up in hair—whether it is excessive shedding, thinning in specific areas, or scalp conditions. This creates an intimate, interpersonal space where conversations about hair care often evolve into discussions about postpartum depression, the loss of a parent, PCOS diagnoses, fibroid surgeries, mental health struggles, and more. In these moments, my role shifts from hairstylist to therapist, nutritionist, and spiritual advisor. 

One moment that stuck with me was with a longtime client. She worked at a prestigious firm while applying to an equally prestigious graduate school, all while juggling an incredibly demanding job. During her appointments, she’d often take work calls, never fully present. One day, as I shampooed her hair, she suddenly burst into tears. In that moment, I didn’t ask what was wrong—I just held space for her to release the weight she had been carrying for so long. After she let out her tears, she confided in me about how exhausting it was to be a Black woman in a white male-dominated field, feeling the pressure to work ten times harder while preparing for graduate school. I listened, offered pockets of advice, and reassured her of her worth. That moment solidified for me that my job is much deeper than styling hair. 

The Salon as a Sanctuary 

Wellness is a revolutionary act for Black women. We have spent decades caring for everyone else, fighting for everyone else’s causes, and caring for ourselves last. The world constantly demands from Black women, and I realized my purpose is to pour back into us—to create a space where we are met with love, compassion, and appreciation. Over the years, many clients have cried in my chair, and each time, I am reminded of the importance of my work. 

Black women are disregarded in so many spaces—healthcare, workplace, beauty industries, financial institutions, etc. But in my chair, they come first. Here, they are reminded of their worth and encouraged to prioritize themselves. 

The hair salon has always been a pillar of our community—a place of refuge, an outward expression of creativity, and the birthplace of cultural trends that shape the world. It is a multigenerational space where stories are shared, traditions are passed down, and bonds are built. I am committed to preserving this culture by fostering a judgment-free zone and being sensitive to the unique experiences of every client. When Black women are allowed to show up as their authentic selves, they heal, grow, and impact the world in profound ways. As a hairstylist, I take immense pride in facilitating that space. 

Black women deserve spaces where they feel safe, valued, and cared for—and that starts with us prioritizing our own wellness. Whether it's booking that hair appointment, committing to a self-care routine, or simply allowing yourself to rest, make yourself a priority. You pour into so many people—don’t forget to pour into yourself. If you are looking for a space where your hair, your energy, and your well-being are honored, I recommend taking the time to find the best safe space to receive just that. 
 You’re always welcome in my chair at Buffy’s Hair Club.